Thursday, 29 December 2011

Comments Enabled.

I have been asked by some of you why I do not allow comments on the blog.  Some of you are already aware of that answer, some obviously not.

A few years ago I had a blog and allowed comments on it.  Everything was fine for a while but then someone I thought was a good friend took exception to something someone said about me - it was a lovely comment for the record - and the derogatory comments started.  I removed them, but it got so bad that in the end I only allowed comments for people who were publicly following my blog.  This did not stop the abuse however and in the end I closed my blog.

When I started a new blog I did not allow comments because obviously I had really had enough the last time, the abuse really was hurtful, and although I am a strong person, it was still very hurtful.  I know the person who was responsible, I emailed her, messaged her, I even rang her up to ask her to stop being such a pain.  For my sins I got another three years of abuse, her claiming I was bullying her.  She told so many lies about me I lost friends - not friends locally, but online friends.  When my brother was dying she told her cronies I was lying about it and I was fishing for sympathy.  Of course she was proven to be a liar then because many people saw what was being posted on my FB wall from local friends and family.

I haven't spoken to her for quite a while now, and I have even cut all ties with our mutual friends.  I figured that if I wasn't good enough then, I most certainly will never be good enough.  Besides, they couldn't have been any kind of friends because they would never have acted like they did.
I have moved on from that time and that crowd, but when I started this blog I felt the same sick feeling welling up inside of me with regards to allowing comments.  Unless you have been subjected to the appalling abuse that some people feel the need to direct others I don't think you can appreciate just how overly cautious this can make a person.

Because there have been many queries regarding comments I have decided that maybe it is time to trust again.  Given that I have nothing to do with this person and her chums anymore might be enough to finally be able to have a blog without having to constantly remove spite and hatred everyday.  I have set the blog to allow comments, but not the anyone option.  Maybe this will need to be changed again to that particular setting, I don't know, we will have to see.
But if the abuse does start up again I will close the comments back down as I am not prepared to put up with that again.  I am not talking about constructive criticism, or someone disagreeing with viewpoint here, I am talking full on abuse, there is a huge difference.

So, if you feel the need to comment on what I have to say, go ahead.

3 comments:

  1. You are right; there is a difference! And you shouldn't have to take anybody's abuse for expressing yourself. I'm glad you've enabled comments and hope that it works out well. :)

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  2. Wow! That's horrible! What a rough way to find out who your friends are. I can't imagine being so callous & petty spirited to want to do that to anyone. I'm glad that you are trying out your comments again, & hope this time it works out much better.

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  3. Ah thank goodness for that! Tell them all to sod off, no one has the right to make you feel rubbish and if it's who I think it is, they certainly don't! x

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